So, I’ve been toying with the idea of selling stuff I make online. I’ve been working on some badges/buttons (like the ones I used for my thesis, but also another new ‘set’ that, in my humble opinion, is pretty exciting), since people seem to love those. But then, I’m thinking of making some prints as well.

These are A5 in size (or half of A4) and 3/4 are references of things dear to my heart.

Yes/No? What do you think? Should I make more or should I just stick to my day job? (LOLJK, I don’t have a dayjob.) Let me know what you think, please. I’d really appreciate it.

Suggestions (of what else to make—as in, shirts, tote bags, etc?) are also most welcome.

Love,
Carina

P.S. Sorry for the stupid title. I haven’t even read that play.

Saving the best for last.

The Daylight Series started out as a personal project of photographer (and one of my awesomest friends) Gabby Cantero. I’ve actually blogged about her here, when she was just starting one of her earlier projects, These Portraits.

Daylight is a super favorite among Gabby’s friends, friends of friends, and has been featured in a few places. The one happening this Saturday is pretty special, kind of bittersweet—it’d be pretty amazing to share this one with Gabby is what I’m saying. So, go, if you are so inclined. It doesn’t really matter if you don’t know anybody. Well, it’d be kinda awkward at first, probably.

But we’re friendly if you are, too. :)

(Poster is of Wanda, taken by Gabby as part of the series. Kris & I tinkered with it a little bit, and this is what happened. You can click on it to view a bigger size on Flickr.)

On our second day in Shanghai (June 8th), we went to the World Expo. To be honest, I thought the interior parts of the pavilions were a little underwhelming (but then again, I had no idea what to expect anyway), but the architecture and designs were insanely good. We didn’t get to see a ton of the insides of the pavilions; mostly because the place was packed and the lines were super long, but it was worth it to see what different places all over the world came up with.

I don’t have photographs of all the pavilions, because it was hard to get great shots without people blocking the way, and I wasn’t used to the 35mm lens I was using (no wide angle shots, I’m afraid) but I hope these photos give you an idea of how massive it all was.

On the way inside.

Family picture, minus me. LOL.

Expo ticket with the mascot.

China Pavilion.

Brother & Sister.

UK.

Italy.

U.A.E.

Denmark. (I loved Denmark’s.)

They flew in The Little Mermaid for the Expo!

And made a short film of her journey.
There were other excellent short films.
Made me want to visit Denmark and/or move there.

More photos under the cut. I hope you look at the photos,
because there really were some beautiful things that I saw that day.


Strange seating! They also had a bike lane.
And a funny fountain.

Sculpture by the entrance.

Philippines. To be honest? It was meh.

Themed Pavilion! This one is called “Urbania,” I think.

Children!

Group shot of strangers.
For I am a creeper.

Singapore and Malaysia.

Germany.

Austria.

France. Switzerland in the background.

The Netherlands.

Tiny Dutch pancakes!

Wooden clogs.

Australia.

Russia.

Sister; Romania in the background.

In line for one of the pavilions.

Latvia & Estonia.

Finland.

Israel.

Luxembourg.

Not too long ago, I operated under the belief that the most important things to look for in people are the things that you have in common. I recited that line from High Fidelity more times than I can count¹ and I said it to people like it was a Bible verse, repeating it whenever the subject of popular culture and preferences came up. I calculated the probability of how much I would get along with a person, based on what they liked. People who liked the same things I did were more attractive to me, even though they turned out to be pretty lame jerks, once I got to know them better.

A question: Why does it matter? A couple of years ago, a wise man named Chuck Klosterman tried to tell me that it didn’t, when I read an essay in his book, “Chuck Klosterman IV.” On the subject of guilty pleasures, Klosterman said: “It never matters what you like; what matters is why you like it.”

Very recently, I met someone I had nothing in common with. We didn’t like the same things and we didn’t have the same friends. We didn’t spend our time in the same manner (I’m assuming), or talk the same way. But there was this certain, particular moment of attraction, of being drawn to his personality, just because he was so earnest and so unapologetic about everything he did and said and believed in.

When I won an LSAA² for Graphic Design, a lot of people were surprised because they had expected a win for Fiction. I’m not saying this to brag or gloat, but because it caused gears in my head to click together, and it was just very telling of my tendency to shy away from the possibility of rejection. See, I’ve always wanted to be a writer. I couldn’t tell you how many countless times I re-wrote my autobiography. I wrote a retelling of C.S. Lewis’ “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” when I was in the third grade. (It was crap.) And if I could, the first things I would save from my hypothetically burning house are my books. One of the panelists for my thesis even said that it seemed like I spent more time writing than designing, which is a comment that is meant to be insulting (as I am an information design major), but it was like (good) music to my ears, because all of them agreed and thought that my writing was good.

I’m more comfortable when my visual work gets rejected, than when the things I write do. I guess the stuff that I write mean more to me, because I put more of myself into what I write than in what I make. It sounds terrible when put like that, but it’s the truth. Writing out feelings and thoughts is a little more personal, a little more confrontational, to me, than making something pretty out of these thoughts and feelings. If someone doesn’t like what I make, it’s very easy to dismiss it as a taste issue. Maybe it’s not their aesthetic, or they just don’t like or get my style. And then, I’m fine again. But if somebody dislikes the things that I write, it usually ends up feeling like a knife to the gut.

The pressure to write something spectacular has been looming over my head for the past two years, which is actually when I stopped writing complete stories. (I would always have a beginning or a middle or an ending, but never all three strung together.) And then there is this feeling of crippling doubt, and then I come up with nothing, or I just don’t even bother to try anymore. I didn’t apply for the LSAA Creative Writing division because I didn’t think I was good enough, because I never tried to be better, and I never put myself out there enough. I was scared of what people might think of me when they read what I write, because it was so easy to hide behind the ambiguity of art… People can ascribe whatever meaning they wanted to on the things that I made, but it’s not so easy to be vague and abstract when you write something out. It’s easier to judge a person that way, and that’s one thing I didn’t want to be done to me.

Chuck Klosterman’s “Chuck Klosterman IV: A Decade of Curious People and Dangerous Ideas”

The problem today is that people care too much about what other people think. Personally, it took me to a point where the ‘me’ that I presented to people became such a carefully-crafted character, just so I could impress the people I liked and stand out from the people that I didn’t. I was still me, but I was some sort of veiled, half-me, where all the embarrassing parts ended up being the hidden parts — reserved, I guess, for my family to see and get to know. (Unfortunately? for them.)

When asked why he chose that particular way of dancing, that not everybody “got” or understood, the earnest guy , with a shrug of his shoulders said, “That’s just what comes from my heart.”³ It’s one of the simplest things I had ever heard in my life (and I’m sure I’ve heard it at least once before), but it was also one of the truest.

I don’t know where to go with this, really, but one of my resolutions for 2010 was to “be brave” and I guess that’s what I’m trying to do. I want to be brave, because people might not like what I write or the way I tell my stories or the words that I choose, but I need to learn how to not let that stop me.

I’ve given up on some of those resolutions on my list, but I’ve still got this, and I’ve still got time, and for now, that’s seems as perfect as it can get.

———
¹ “…what really matters is what you like, not what you are like… Books, records, films — these things matter. Call me shallow but it’s the fuckin’ truth.” — High Fidelity, 2000.
² Loyola Schools Art Awards.
³ Translated. He said, in Filipino, “E ‘yun ‘yung nasa puso ko e.”

Father Javellana and Dra. Vilches cutting the ribbon.

Paulina making last minute edits.

Tracy making a LED lantern! Over at Meggy Kawsek’s area.

Made one, too. :)
(Photo taken by Glen.)

Children’s books by Kim Ng.

Paulina’s personal lightsaber duel.

Kris Caguiat’s thesis.

Mine!

I have some more (but not a lot) of photos over at my Flickr, if you guys want to see.

The exhibit will be ongoing until Friday, I think. :) The works are mounted over at the area behind the stairs on the first floor of the Rizal (or, old) Library.

You know, kind of like a cupboard.

I have loads more to say, and obviously, the insides of this book(let :( it’s really short) has more pages. But I am still swamped, so this little update will have to do. I just wanted to say IT IS FINISHED because I really was getting a little desperate because it seemed like it was going nowhere… but here it is.

And thesis, if I may say so, it is absolutely lovely to see you.

Don’t Forget, Clementine is the band of a few of my (and Paulina’s) friends. We were asked to do their album art, since they are releasing one this month. It’s called Grace, And Dragging Her Wings and the launch is actually next Saturday, December 12, 2009.

If you live near or want a copy of the album (because they are extremely good), drop by! To maybe somehow “convince” you into going, here are a few shots of the inlay. (This leads to their MySpace account, with short samples.)

I promise, we are going to have a time.

While fixing up my Cargo Collective account (which doesn’t really have much up, yet, so there’s very little point in linking to it), I realized that for the past three years, I have been including a certain project of mine in portfolio sites and resumés, and it is called Baraja. I am sure you are familiar with it. In fact, if we do not already know each other from a separate online platform (or in real life), that is probably how you got here in the first place.

Anyway, I got a little bit disappointed because I had this whole idea in my head, when I first registered this website, that I would be the kind of person who would be making stuff all day and posting about the process and the output or whatever on here. Which has clearly not been the case. I’ve actually been posting some exercises I had been doing on my Tumblr and my Flickr, but since I am generally averse to watermarks, there have been a few times where my work has been stolen and reposted without credit, so I don’t really know how safe the Internet is anymore.

I used to tell myself, “Well, at least that means your work is good enough to steal,” or “Well, if they steal something of yours, that makes them pathetic, not you.” But now that it’s happened to me, it really is a sucky feeling. I especially hate it when they take something of yours, and then re-alter and tweak it. Amy Ng from Pikaland.com recently had this to say about the issue: “When someone copies your work, it’s a crime against the spirit of sharing that is prevalent online.”

And it’s true. But I realized that I shouldn’t let them stop me from posting my work online, because it really is the best place to get critique and to get hired for projects or tapped for collaborations. So, here! Some small sneak peeks of the last few projects I’d been working on:

(click for bigger)
This is something I made for The Bead Shop, which is going to launch
a collection of luck-themed jewelry.

This was a collaboration with Paulina Ortega.
We were tapped by our friend, Marvin Sayson to design
Don’t Forget, Clementine‘s new album, Grace, and Dragging Her Wings.
It was a lot of fun (I got stressed out a few times, but mostly because of time.)

(click for bigger)
Lastly, here are some mock-ups of the book covers for my thesis.
I don’t know what to do about it, but judging from the last meeting I had
with my thesis adviser, I would like to think that it was pretty well-received.

YAY. Hopefully I’ll be making more things or reading more or writing more the next few days. I’ve actually finished reading Dave Eggers’ “The Wild Things,” so maybe I can write about that. One thing you should know, though, is that book really made me really, really sad, and my heart was really heavy after it. I sometimes find Dave Eggers’ prose a little overwrought, but this book really found new ways to break my heart.

But I’ll talk about that tomorrow, maybe. For now, I have to get back to the daily grind and read Aristotle for Philosophy. Sometimes, I really love school, but then I get reminded that I need to be good at it, and then it’s not so fun anymore.