Fitness Agenda: After September, I Will Either Be a HOPA or Dead. // September 3, 2010

Or, you know, still fat.

I hate diets. I hate exercising. I hate most kinds of physical exertion. When I was still in school, other people lived for P.E., while I prayed for it to miraculously go away. Out of the four required P.E. subjects we had to take in Ateneo, my favorite was P.E. 101, which was basically an afternoon class where we sat in an airconditioned classroom and looked at Powerpoint slides, listening patiently at the lecturer’s recycled stories.

So, you know, all these preferences that come naturally to me? Not really agreeable when one of my Greatest Wishes In Life is to have a hot bod. Call me shallow, but I just want my clothes to fit better. Late last year, I tried going to the gym (I obviously quit). Earlier this year, I tried Jillian Michaels’ 30-Day Shred, which I quit before I even reached Level 2. On more than one occasion, I joined in on my church’s church-wide fasting program, with the hidden agenda of shedding a couple of pounds. Shameless, I know.

When I contracted dengue fever last week, I lost between 4-6 lbs. All of which I just gained back. Now, I have come to realize that if I want to get rid of my 4-year-old Food Baby, I am going to have to put some work into it. I would enlist the help of Nerd Fitness Master, John Green, using his new video, Fitness For Nerds. But I think I’m going to try and run on the treadmill for a little while. And then maybe do a little push-ups, et cetera.

Every time I think about exercising, I think of that hypothetical period as the Worst Twenty Minutes Of My Life, and then I end up just eating peanut m&m’s (which is blatantly counter-productive) or reading or going on Tumblr. I mean, I just really want my jeans to fit.

And, you know, if I can’t even spare twenty minutes of my day—which, I learned from church, is like a little over 1% of my day—then, I deserve to have ill-fitting jeans. If, at one point in the middle of my transformation, I am tempted to tap-out, then I will at least have this blog entry to look back on and remind myself that I have declared to the Internet my intentions of being at least a little bit thinner by the end of September. And then, I will suck it up and run on the treadmill, with images of my own fat, all anthropomorphic, running after me, like that one episode of Doctor Who with the adiposians.

 

September 1st! How Exciting. // September 1, 2010

The Start of September means a lot of things to me. It means that it is Kirk Long’s birthday, which in turn means that I am a creeper for knowing that sort of information (but it’s kind of along the lines of cannot unsee, you know?). It also means that it’s the start of term for Hogwarts students, which in turn means that I am a huge dork unable to move on from this fantastic series. Not that I would particularly like to, because I do enjoy being part of this fandom.

I was toying with the idea of posting a Harry Potter-related post for everyday of September, just to prove to you all that my obsession knows very little bounds. But I am restraining myself. Also, it’s very hard to think of things to post for thirty consecutive days. And also, I fear for my bandwidth, because it’s just really not going to hold.

Anyway, I’ve decided, instead, to curate a list of some of my favorite things about the Harry Potter community. While it houses the strangest, most repressed people in the world, the HP community is also home to some of the most brilliant people still roaming about on this earth. And, you know, I’m really out to prove that. And so, a list! Of my favorite HP-related, unofficial projects. Get ready for some totally awesome finds.

1. 
   Wizard Rock
   First up is Wizard Rock, or in shorthand, Wrock! The pioneers for this strange genre of music is a little group called Harry and the Potters (who’ve actually had their own Daytrotter session!). It also paved the way for similarly-named groups (e.g., Draco and the Malfoys, Ginny and the Weasleys. Another name trend follows The Remus Lupins, e.g., The Whomping Willows, The Moaning Myrtles, etc). The genre is curious because it doesn’t lump the groups by sound, rather, by subject matter. Most Wrock groups are just bands that are inspired by Harry Potter, most of whom have songs that center on the series. Here is a website to cater to most of your Wrock needs, because a bullet point is way too short to delve into the whole business. Here’s a list of most known Wrock bands, though. It is quite a sizable list.

   To the untrained eye (and ear), this is probably the dorkiest thing in the world. However, if you must know, Wrock has a very big following—sometimes, these bands even go on tour! My favorite is probably The Remus Lupins, whose battlecry is: “Fight evil, read books!”

2. 
   The Harry Potter Alliance
   HP Alliance exists for the furtherance of good. It was set up to combat our world’s version of “dark and difficult times.” Targeting issues like global warming, genocide and poverty, the HP Alliance uses its connection to the millions of HP fans to campaign against these issues, partnering with organizations like Genocide Intervention Network, Amnesty International and Oxfam. Just recently, they won $250,000 from the Chase Challenge, meant to benefit causes such as literacy and GLBT rights. They’ve also helped protect the civilians of Darfur and Burma, and had a hand in Helping Haiti Heal. An excellent use of their powers, if you ask me.
3. 
   A Very Potter Musical
   Where do I even begin? This is one of the best things on YouTube right now, probably. A Very Potter Musical is a hilarious fan-made parody of the World of Harry Potter. Highlights include excellent cast performances, most notably of Ron Weasley and Draco Malfoy, and of course, the appearance of Rumbleroar, the Headmaster of Pigfarts, Hogwarts’ counterpart… in Mars. You can watch the hilarity ensue over here. Uh-huh, yeah, I made it easy for you.
4. 
   The Shoebox Project
   A Marauder-era fic, complete with photos and drawings and letters between Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs. It is, at the same time, tender, endearing, charming and funny. A hypothetical glimpse at the life of James Potter and his friends. One of the best things ever to grace LiveJournal, if I may. It was used to be housed over here, I don’t know what happened. However, a kind soul has uploaded the .pdfs, so you can still read up and catch up with the rest of the internet. It hasn’t been updated in a while, however. We’re all still waiting for that fateful day.
5. 
   Mugglecast
   Mugglecast might be my favorite Harry Potter podcast, ever. I remember listening to all sorts of wonderful discussions and theories on my way to and from school. It was particularly exciting, pre-Deathly Hallows, and the hosts were all speculating as to what the remaining horcruxes were, and who exactly R.A.B. was, and what would Harry’s demise be. There was even one episode where they tried to piece together the ending of the book based on the released artwork of the hardcover edition. As far as I know, it’s still up and running, especially since the last film adaptation is still about to be released, but I haven’t listened in lately. Maybe I should take this as a sign that I should start again.

Well, that’s it for now! Honorable Mentions include The Draco/Hermione Fic Exchange, which is only my favorite fanfic exchange in the world (Yes, I’m a D/Hr shipper, what of it?), The Draco Trilogy, which was written way before Harry Potter came to an end (so there’s a lot of inconsistencies now). The author, Cassandra Clare, has recently launched a professional career, with a fantasy trilogy of her own. Lastly! My Immortal, which is the best Harry Potter fanfic on the Internet right now.

By best, I meant worst. But I suppose it is good for the lulz.

OK, for the rest of September, I will be posting a lot of Harry-centric bits and pieces. Consider this a warning, to stay away or for excitement, your pick! Additionally, you can read my Harry Potter story here, on Book Report.

 

Hospital Woes. // August 31, 2010

Okay, so I lied. I was going to save my hospital escapades for another time, when it was particularly bleak and I needed something else to rant about, or when I run out of things to blog about… which is actually kind of the case right now. I wish I had some pictures, but this is going to be mostly text-based because all the photos I have (meaning, the ones my dad took) make me look like shit, so I am not going to post them.

Anyway, my brief stint in the hospital… was actually the first time I got confined since I was in the third grade! It is not as enjoyable as I remembered it being. When I had been confined then, the hospital was actually better, but that’s beside the point. I think my first-time viewage of a John Hughes movie (Sixteen Candles!) made it better. I had to do homework then, but that was somehow OK.

This time around, I just kind of waited for the next show I wanted to see on television (although, one bright spot was probably getting introduced to White Collar‘s Matt Bomer, by way of a marathon) and also for the itchiness to go away. My legs felt super prickly and I couldn’t sleep, sometimes, because of so many minor discomforts that didn’t really count as pain, but bothered me to the point of I Cannot Get Any Sleep, anyway.

The nurses also liked going in at random times (3 a.m., just as I am about to fall asleep, dammit) to check my temperature (which never reached past 37 once my condition stabilized) and my blood pressure. They also liked checking my IV drip and regulating and re-regulating the flow, resulting into random stabby sensations up my right arm. Every single time. Annoyingly enough, at one point, they forgot to check the IV drip and it was almost all out when I noticed. I do not know what would have happened, but I do know that that would be bad.

On the list of other useless things they like doing is asking me how much I have peed or pooped since so-and-so time that day. I also got asked once how many glasses of water I drank during the day… at home.

That aside, the food was also always cold, and not very appetizing. I guess that’s not really their main concern. I only ate the yema (haha) and also the soup that came with one of the meals. But fret not, the food wasn’t wasted since whoever was watching over me usually ate the food. I mostly had Skyflakes with a healthy dose of IV drip on the side and lots of water and Gatorade. On the first day, I tried eating but then I couldn’t keep it down! TMI, but there you go.

Things I Have Discovered While In the Hospital:

• Charmed still airs on local TV. Every morning, Tuesdays-Saturdays. I will not tell you what channel because you are not supposed to see that atrocious show.
• It’s hard to read with only one hand. You would think it wouldn’t be so hard, but it really is.
• When you are not within reach of good music, you tend to hum them a lot or sing them. Even when you are alone, or when the person you are with is sleeping.
• It’s hard to be without a limb, even if it is only one hand. I think I would probably be significantly less productive if I was missing even a finger. But that’s just because I’m a weakling.
• Charmed is really bad.
• I am not the kind of person who likes having visitors around.
• It’s nice to read poetry when you have nothing else to do. (I read Sarah Manguso’s Siste Viator. It was good.)
• Your hair smells really gross after days of not bathing. Like, really.
• Being admitted to the hospital is not fun.

I have many other lessons and discoveries, but I’ll spare you. I wish I had some sort of epiphany or life-changing life choice to accompany this lame experience, but alas, I do not. The last time I was hospitalized, I remembered that I switched from grape juice to orange juice (I wasn’t allowed to drink or eat dark food because it could translate as internal bleeding via X-ray), and also I discovered a kindred spirit in Samantha Baker.

Now, though, I just really wanted to GTFO of that place. The people were uncaring and insensitive and my body was super upset with itself. And the waiting was really the worst. I have never experienced this kind of agony of waiting since high school, maybe, while waiting for the bell to signal dismissal. (Here is a photo of that AWESOME, AWESOME time. I hope the sarcasm translates, but if it doesn’t, now you know that I was being sarcastic. Because I just told you.)

I hated waiting, and I hated having to watch Charmed because nothing else was on.

But, I suppose that that was a necessary step and detour for me to get better. Because I don’t think that I would have recovered as fast without the sleepless nights, the bad television, the constant jabs of pain up my arm and the gross food. Maybe I could do without one or two of those things, but despite the discomforts, I’m glad that hospitals exist because I do not want to feel that shitty again. And now, I am better and I actually have that horrid place to thank!

Stay away from these people.

 

 

 

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